Why am I doing this? How I decided to learn about alpacas

Everyone wants to know the how and why of my decision to become an 'alpaca intern'. I did not just wake up one morning and decide to run down this road. Those who know me, know I do not just blindly run down a path. I always have a pros and cons list, and think through outcomes. If anything, I take TOO long to decide on a course of action.

So how did I get here? Well, in August 2008 I completed my Master's of Library Science at Indiana University. I had decided it was time to head back to Colorado to help out my Mom and sister, and just generally be closer geographically. I had also been gone from Colorado for 10 years, and missed it quite a lot. My friend Doug was gracious enough to open his home to me, and gave me a room in the basement and run of the kitchen. OH, and space in the office so I could job hunt all day. My plan was to put most of my belongings in storage, find a job, pay off bills with the paycheck from that job, and then get my own place and a car.

Little did I know that in September of 2008 the economy would implode, making this whole 'job hunt' thing very very difficult. I always register with temp agencies when I am between jobs, and always have success with that strategy. This time, however, was different. There were no temp jobs. The whole game had shifted, it all seemed to just grind to a halt. Luckily, I had pulled money out of my IRA before the crash, and had planned on being unemployed for 6 months. Since I couldn't get temp work, though, I went through the IRA money quicker than planned.

Around May 2009 I got a part time job in an independently owned candle store. While it was good to get out of the house, it only paid a little above minimum wage. I was so happy to be learning new things, like how to shrink wrap a candle without melting it, and happy to interact with customers, but it wasn't a good long term solution.

Also around that time, a friend in Bloomington suggested I move back to town and stay with her. I had been thinking along the same lines, because I was getting very very depressed in Denver, and thought I could shake it up and regroup. Also, it's a lot easier to get around without a car in Bloomington, since it's so small. I waited until I got word I was not selected for a job I had REALLY wanted, as a paraprofessional 'Mobile Training Unit driver' at a major library system before I decided to leave. My whole theory had (and still is) that I will take the first job offered. So far, none have been offered.

Back in Bloomington, that housing situation lasted 25 days before my friend decided it would not work. LUCKILY for me, my friend/hairstylist Garland was there to scoop me up and move me in to his apartment. He gave me his room, and moved to the living room. He gave me a closet and a shelf in the bathroom. I think he's an angel in disguise. :)

OH, part of the reason I moved in with Garland is that I had just gotten a temp job in his apartment complex! (for $8.50/hour) I ended up working there for 3 months, and audited all of their lease files more than once. I calculated close to 1500 files total. Ouch. My brain hurt.

They finally ran out of things for me to do. That's the life of a temp. :)

After that, I was unemployed for a month. I had one temp job, cleaning bathrooms in a sorority house for three days. Wow. THEN I got a job as a part time Abstractor at a Title company. Even though it was only part time, and only $10/hour, it was a wonderful wonderful job. I got to look things up in the Recorder's Office and the Courthouse....moving from building to building, walking around downtown Bloomington. Lovely. Got to be detail oriented, and social, and outside a bit.

But then, in January 2010, the owner announced the business was closing. So in January 2010 I was left with no job again. I had, in the meantime filed for bankruptcy and had to stick around Indiana through March for the hearing.

It really hit me hard to get laid of from the abstractor job. I had truly enjoyed it, and the people I worked with. Of course, I immediately called all the temp agencies I had registered with to let them know I was available again. But something had shifted in me. I realized I could not keep crashing with friends indefinitely. I know I have family and friends who are willing to let me stay with them, but I feel so guilty for having to do that. I also have no money to move myself across the country. I have no car. The problems will be the same everywhere: finding temp jobs, finding a full time career job, and transportation.

And I am still stuck on the idea that I want a job I like, doing something related to this MLS I spent time and money to get. I've worked the entry level jobs I hated to 'make it through' for years. I just can't bring myself to apply for a job I know I won't like. Since I am 'rootless' right now, there is no point in staying somewhere just for the sake of a job if it's not in my chosen field. I can't lie in an interview, it's just not how I'm programmed. I also am tired of moving alone, and tired of working merely to survive. I want to be a part of a community, and something positive.

I started thinking about the Great Depression, and other work/housing options. My biggest problems are housing and transportation. I know I am a hard worker, and put my all into any task at hand. This approach of temping and job hunting was exhausting me.

I made a list of things I like: books/information, kids, animals, nature. I thought maybe if I could find a place that would give me housing in exchange for work I can figure out the rest. That's when I thought about farms. I did a search on 'alpacas and Indiana' and found the White Violet Center. I picked alpacas, because I've knit with their fiber, and I'd seen a PBS segment about them and found them fascinating.

This place seemed like a dream come true!! They offered an internship with room and some board in exchange for labor. While I am out of shape, I REALLY miss being active and doing outside work. I emailed them, applied officially, had to ask people to write references (again), Garland drove me up for an interview and tour, and here I am.

I don't know where this will take me. I honestly don't know what I will do with what I am learning about alpacas and composting. But I have a safe place to sleep and eat, my work is valued and necessary, and I feel like I am making a positive contribution to something sustainable. I have no income for the foreseeable future, which is a choice I have never made before. I am trying to figure something out, and not freak out. I view the daily farm chores as mentally and spiritually cleansing. I need work to do, they need a worker. This situation will work for a while.

OH, and the Center has a small library/resource center with a CARD CATALOG. I am working to file a three year backlog of all their cards. Next I will get them converted to an open source system which can easily be maintained after I leave. I cannot escape my inner librarian. :)

Long story, but there you go.